Sep 5, 2014

Best Adult Jokes


Q: What is the difference between an illegal immigrant and E.T.?

A: E.T. eventually went home!

Q: Why can't you hear a psychiatrist using the bathroom?

A: Because the 'p' is silent

Q: Did you hear about the celebrity murderer?

A: He was shooting for the stars.

Q: Do you know what the square root of 69 is?

A: Ate something

Q: What do you call a 13 year old girl from Kentucky who can run faster than her six brothers?

A: A virgin.

Junior! Did you hibernate all winter like you were supposed to?" "Hibernate? Shit, Ma, I thought you said 'masturbate'!”

A blonde decides to get a porno movie, so she goes to the store and picks one with a fairly dirty title. When she puts the DVD in and presses 'PLAY,' the screen is fuzzy and nothing is going on. Frustrated, she calls the store about the movie. They ask her what the title is, and she replies, "Head Cleaner".”



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